My son has lived with my parents for the past 2 years after his mother ''gave him to me'' and me for 6 months after that. He would have lived with me sooner, but my job did not make this feasible until now. My son has seen his mother twice in the last year (her decision). She now wants to know where I live with my son and new partner. My son is scared of her aggressive temper, frequently focused at him. My son has had sleepless nights thinking he may have to see her and live with her. He is 9 years old. I have a court order for parental responsibility gained in 1999, after she decided he could no longer live with just me, and that she should be a part of his life. This lasted for less than a year. Do I have to tell her where I live, even though she has changed phone numbers and moved house without telling us, so I have no means of contacting her directly?
November 27, 2008 by Anonymous
Whether or not you voluntarily or otherwise tell your son's mother where you are living will not resolve this problem. The situation clearly needs to be put in order for everybody's sake. If your son is to live with you it would probably be appropriate for you to obtain a residence order in order to regularise the position.
You need also to give very careful thought to what is in your son's best interest. Is it really in his best interest that he should not be allowed contact with his mother? Should you not put his fears at rest and assure him that you will protect him if he has contact.
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